Each week on a Sunday afternoon, join Alex (of Randomly Yours, Alex) and Katharine (of the unpronounceable Ventureadlaxre), as they re-watch the Australian-American sci-fi show Farscape, notable for the Jim Henson animatronic puppets, the excellent mish-mash of accents, and the best OTP ship of all time.

Season One, Episode Eight: That Old Black Magic

Whilst in a marketplace on a planet, Crichton gets tricked away by some old wizard guy for his own sick and twisted games. Which, in turn, show that more people than we think can be sick and twisted also.

K: Rygel needs medication? Ah well, life comes and goes. Bring back the cute bird instead.

A: And John’s in his old space suit!

AHAHA Rygel has man-flu and Crichton is grossed out by the idea of raw brains.

Hey that red dude is an Aussie! That’s Grant Bowler!

K: Ohhh, that’s who it is!

It’s never a good thing when some random knows your name. Even worse when it’s some weird Aussie. Where’s Aeryn to protect him when he needs it?

A: Also when it’s someone in a clown outfit. ALWAYS BAD.

Oh John, you are SO GULLIBLE.

Oh goddess Zhaan flirting is SO CUTE.

K: I think I’d get sick of travelling to places where you always have to be on your guard and haggle for things.

A: You and I are not designed to be explorers. Nor mercenaries. Nor chased across foreign territories by —

K: And now we have a happy Alex.

A: CRAAAAAAAAIS! Honey you don’t look well, are you sleeping enough? Maybe you need some soup. I’ll make you some soup.

“In my chamber, Lieutenant” – significant glance – RAWR.

K: Don’t make him soup, Alex, he can’t be trusted.

And neither can Crichton. This is why he shouldn’t be left unsupervised. Like a puppy.

A: the dictionary definition of naive is John Crichton, Earthling.

Aeryn is exiled for touching an alien, and Crais destroys instructions from the high council with no fear because Revenge? You’re a hypocrite, darling.

K: This is one thing where I’m not sure if Farscape does well or not. It’s all a bit wacky and timey whimy and inhabiting two places at once and transportation at will, but then there seem to be odd instances of lacking the ability for seemingly simple things…

A: Hmm it is a little bit too much like magic rather than tech, which seems to go against the theory of the show – the acts of Zhaan and other spiritual people aren’t usually as flashy.

Aeryn: “Where’s Crichton? He keeps wandering off” – JUST LIKE A PUPPY. Not sure puppies usually smell that much, though maybe D’Argo would disagree.

I don’t especially like D’Argo when he’s threatening young girls.

K: The fight scenes and gore makeup leave a little to be desired. And the magenta guy seems familiar… (Didn’t know who it was until I read your notes above!)

A: … and hot. With appalling dialogue (except when flirting with Zhaan).

K: And Aeryn is still considering locals to be primitive, and that only she and D’Argo have any real ability.

A: It’s how she’s been taught to perceive the world I guess; why would sophisticated people need Peacekeepers imposed on them?

K: Eww Rygel is gross.

Noooo Zhaan, only do it on those who need it!

A: this new revelation about Zhaan – that she once was capable of doing damage to others – is such an interesting revelation about her character.

Aw Crichton being all the bigger man by not hurting Crais. Yeh yeh.

Magenta-Bowler, you’ve come around to the idea of fighting against Maldis AWFULLY quickly.

K: Wouldn’t Crais be in high amount of pain and slurring his words being around fire? And I thought parents weren’t really a thing in Sebacean (or Peacekeeper) society? Don’t they get matched up, have kids, and they get shipped off to some factory somewhere? My memory is rubbish…

A: his anger cools him down (or he hasn’t had time to be affected yet).

Perhaps Crais was from a different sort of family? I seem to remember that Aeryn didn’t know her parents, or didn’t feel affection? We’ll come to that eventually. But clearly Crais was effectively stolen.

K: Ahh that’s true – so Aeryn was peacekeeper through her parents too, basically. Never any choice of any other life.

This guy is really like a Doctor Who villain.

A: chewing scenery, you mean.

K: D’Argo is adorable though, ‘evil spell’ indeed. Aeryn’s quite quick to give up on the door, though. Oh, no, apparently not. Atta girl, Aeryn!

A: D’Argo giving up so quickly? Weird. And another sweet, significant moment between D’Argo and Zhaan.

How does Crichton know that Maldis is feeding off them? That’s not exactly obvious to someone from Earth.

K: Your boyfriend has issues, Alex.

A: He has family problems. But look! He’s willing to listen to Crichton! … well, for a little while, anyway.

K: That’ll sort out Rygel’s cold, at least. I think we all enjoyed that a bit, Zhaan. Rygel is such a pain in the ass.

A: um, wow. Harsh. Awesome use of the puppet though.

“Part of me enjoyed that” – that’s because Rygel is a gigantic pain, Zhaan. 

K: Noooo, Aeryn! D’Argo! Run from the shiny red mist!

A: Crichton, I’m not sure that taunting Crais is a good idea. Seriously.

K: Fight, fight, fight! You can never trust Crais, Crichton. We’re barely halfway into the first season… It’s like when you’re watching a crime series and they ‘catch the murderer’ but you know the episode has thirty minutes still left in the episode…

A: Aw I love Crichton being so trusting. I do not love his shoulder being dislocated.

K: Rygel is such a jerk. Where’s Zhaan and magenta guy when you need them?

A: But Rygel DOES attempt to give him an appropriate funeral send-off… well, kind of. Of course, he then does claim all of Crichton’s possessions… ok, he’s a jerk.

Argh flashbacks to Mel Gibson in Lethal Weapon with that dislocated shoulder.

K: Good on ya Crichton, don’t trust this chap at all. That’s what they tried to use in the Hunger Games too. Only one has to die, indeed. John really does ramble on when he’s stressed.

A: John’s interrogating him, secretly, isn’t it? Surely? Isn’t it deliberate?  😛

K: Did they just knock over a Croquembouche? Those jerks!

A: snort.

Nice use of the platter as a weapon, Crais.

K: Where’s Aeryn and D’Argo anyway?

A: FREAKY BLUE EYES Zhaan.

Maldis, you are grotesque, and evil.

K: Zhaan saves the day! We need another line in our tally

A: Ah, but at what cost?

K: oh, Aeryn and D’Argo were frozen. Right. They should have used another colour mist.

A: Truly. Surely that wouldn’t have been hard for the graphics department.

K: John has very nice nails for a man. And I think this is the start of poor John losing his mind for good.

A: Can you blame him?

K: So in a way, Zhaan really did learn how to inflict pain once more. And Crais has major issues. ISSUES, ALEX.

And Zhaan has issues. Everyone has issues! Yaaaay!

A: aw, pretty man dies saving his planet. And I never said that Crais was entirely stable… and that particular execution was especially unwarranted.  

Aeryn apologises and insults Zhaan in one phrase! Impressive!

John recording his thoughts! Haven’t seen that in a while.

Poor, poor Zhaan. These events were hardest for her, I think, in the long run.

In Summary, Crichton needs to be kept on one of those kiddie harness/retractable leashes when they go out in public. Or just leave him on Moya maybe.

Number of times Zhaan saves the day: 1

Number of times Aeryn saves the day: 3

Number of times John saves the day: 4

Times John compares someplace to Earth: 1

References Star Wars: 1

Join us next week for episode nine, DNA Mad Scientist